Today at school no one is dressed up apart from me. That's a lie. I wore this exact same outfit two weeks ago but this time I'm wearing a cowboy hat too. Obviously this strange custom needs to be explained so that children understand why they aren't part of this ridiculous holiday.
Enter my Grade 3 co-teacher.
"I'll explain this bizarre holiday to these third graders using a PPT presentation fresh off of the Korean equivalent of waygook.org" she gallantly thinks to herself.
Boy, was she wrong. The second slide in the presentation asks "Where does Halloween come from?" The answer: Celtic Tradition.
"Oh, English Teacher, what does this mean?"
What I felt like saying: "Well, it originated from Paganism, which originated from Ireland. Those are the people who only eat potatoes because after they fell from the sky those Irelanders, as they like to be called, ate all the dinosaurs and then all the dinosaurs died, just like the buffalo, remember that digression children? Now they only eat potatoes because its the closest thing to dinosaur meat in both flavor and texture. Back to the question though, they celebrate Halloween because they believed the Giant Spaghetti Monsters from Mars, who have ancestral lineage to dinosaurs, come to Earth seeking revenge for their slaughtered brethren on October 31st. Irelanders disguise themselves by dressing up as other people who don't have fire-red hair or neon green lips. And they decided to eat candy instead of potatoes too. That's all the facts you need children."
Annnnnd what I actually said: "It's just really old."
I tuned out the rest of the PPT cuing in on words like "Jombie," "Bampire," and "Gosootuh." Then we started a lesson on weather which went splendidly each time. This was my last day with grade 3s and I couldn't be happier with how it turned out. As I type, the two quietest kids in today's storytelling class are doing a Halloween word search. While the others are nowhere to be found. Life's great.
Happy Halloween!
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
Monday, October 28, 2013
Dajeon Halloween Hat X
This past weekend was Dajeon's tenth annual Halloween Hat Tournament. Held along the river and under the big ol'sun the setting was prime. AND with little to no wind it was a great time for Ultimate.
'stumes:
On Halloween, plenty of people equals plenty of costumes: it was great to see costumes that reflected the creativity and fun-loving philosophy behind the ROK-U community. From the 40+ onesies, and the drag queens to the local impersonations and Alcohol-themed super heroes and everything in between everything was amazing. One of the neatest ones was Operation, and a Ramen Samurai but I was too drunk to remember seeing that. The spirit of the game flowed into the spirit of Halloween, everyone was happy and classy the whole weekend.
Highlights
Obviously I didn't see everything with three games being played at once but here are five things I'll never forget... until something better happens. One highlight I didn't see was K-Mike's callahan on Sunday, kudos to him.The Greatest;
Nick Whale was running with two defenders after a disc heading to the end zone. The disc was at least eight feet in the air and staying there. No biggy, Nick just leaped out the back of the end zone and threw it behind him like he's done it a million times. Whale's throw ended up right in between his trailing teammate's hands. Both made the play look easy.
The Bid:
James CheeseWhiz (our only recurring player) was on the far side of the field ten feet out of the end zone. He put a dart into the endzone to a wide open Dan Danson. Danson made a great bid, parallel to the ground, fully extended, and made a spectacular one handed grab. It could have been an easier play... but what's the fun in that?
Coast to Coast
Andy Wind, the man behind the event, plays so hard every second of the game it's just awesome to watch. He cut deep, leaving his man behind, and laid out for a disc that was a finger tip away from being caught. Off the turn, the opposition's handler put a deep disc to Wind's man who was all by himself. With Wind just getting up off the ground it looked like an easy point. Not the case Wind sprung up off the grass and chased down the disc into his own end zone and smacked it out of bounds. Simply nuts.
Up in the Air
CheeseWhiz was defending Travis Nurse who was chasing down a bomb. The disc was curling into the corner of end zone and coming down. Both guys leaped up for it leaving a solid two feet between cleats and grass. James managed to get a hand on it pushing it out towards the sideline. That was until Travis got under the disc and brought it down, in bounds, with two hands.Tips
Obviously I didn't get to play an actual game this weekend since you can't defend with one arm but I still got to play a fun game of Tips. Which is non-contact and usually goes perfectly with a beer in one hand. It was four-on-four. As usual headers, knees, and kicks are worth more points than tipping the disc with your hands. The disc was being thrown to my team it dropped pretty quickly. CheeseWhiz (I promise I'm not following him.) kicked it up and sent it wobbling over to me. Still too low to grab I popped it up with the toe of my shoe and James managed to grab it. Double-kick, 10 points! I couldn't find it on youTube so this was obviously the first one ever. It's nice to be a part of history.
This tourney was great, as was the partay (from what I heard), and I can't wait to play in Halloween XI!
This tourney was great, as was the partay (from what I heard), and I can't wait to play in Halloween XI!
TGIFF
Sorry I've had a long few days since this happened and caught up on some sleep. Can't wait for the next Friday!
I had three surprisingly good classes today. Yesterday being a test day I guess no third grader has a reason to be high strung any more. This lesson is the last one of the unit so we did a review of listening, speaking, and writing. One class barely participated but the rest were really into the activity and the gif at the end. I would go as far as to say that I had an amazing morning.
At the stroke of noon, everything changed. The last class of the morning came in clique by clique. The boys were yelling, others fighting, the girls were conspiring and others were dragging one another around on the floor. One of the lower level students came in and was crying. She sits directly across from my co-teacher who didn't do anything about anything until the bell rang. When the bell finally rang the class sat in their seats and continued yammering in Korean. Meanwhile this little girl at the front is still sobbing while her neighbor is yelling to his friend at the back of the class. One of the students is missing and for some bizarre reason my CT asked where he was. The question brought on a tidal wave of answers. With this class if one person says something you get 26 other students telling their side of the story. I hate it. At the same time I know more of these third graders because my office shares a wall with them. Honestly, I don't know how I've survived up until now.
Finally the boy who was late came in moody as ever and just completely shut down, but he talked a little bit during the speaking activity after cooling down from what looked like a good old fashion angry cry.
Anyways my CT took the first half of the class and decides to ask them questions using words only one student knows. And, of course, this is the noisiest kid in the class. My co-teacher plows through the textbook portion and I get through my activity with only a few hiccups which involved shushing the class and calling out ten kids. Five for hitting their neighbors; two for talking; another two for shouting out the wrong answer; and one for wiping his boogers on the top of his desk. With three minutes left my co-teacher plays a song about the lesson. This being the last lesson in the unit everyone knows the song off by heart and start yelling and screaming like hooligans at a soccer game. The two criers plug their ears and bury their heads in their desk. Half way through the boy who was late yelled over all of them in Korean which resulted in 25 voices attacking right back. There was no control, nothing could prevent a screaming match except for the bell and the promise of food. As the yelling continued to escalate, looking at the clock I just started waving and saying goodbye. They all stopped looking in wonder and hearing the end of the bell chiming. In an even bigger uproar everyone climbs overs chairs and desks to file out the backdoor of the classroom. Waving good bye to the last student it was remarkable to see what they left behind. A desk was knocked over, no chairs were pushed in, worksheets littered the floor and my co-teacher was already out the door.
I put on some Sammy R to clean and straighten the desks. Some students from another third grade class came into help as well. I promised them candy but I don't think they understood.
Thank goodness lunch was good. Then my afternoon class was just tattle-tales and nothing fun. I'm burnt out. Sleep is happening tonight.
I had three surprisingly good classes today. Yesterday being a test day I guess no third grader has a reason to be high strung any more. This lesson is the last one of the unit so we did a review of listening, speaking, and writing. One class barely participated but the rest were really into the activity and the gif at the end. I would go as far as to say that I had an amazing morning.
At the stroke of noon, everything changed. The last class of the morning came in clique by clique. The boys were yelling, others fighting, the girls were conspiring and others were dragging one another around on the floor. One of the lower level students came in and was crying. She sits directly across from my co-teacher who didn't do anything about anything until the bell rang. When the bell finally rang the class sat in their seats and continued yammering in Korean. Meanwhile this little girl at the front is still sobbing while her neighbor is yelling to his friend at the back of the class. One of the students is missing and for some bizarre reason my CT asked where he was. The question brought on a tidal wave of answers. With this class if one person says something you get 26 other students telling their side of the story. I hate it. At the same time I know more of these third graders because my office shares a wall with them. Honestly, I don't know how I've survived up until now.
Finally the boy who was late came in moody as ever and just completely shut down, but he talked a little bit during the speaking activity after cooling down from what looked like a good old fashion angry cry.
Anyways my CT took the first half of the class and decides to ask them questions using words only one student knows. And, of course, this is the noisiest kid in the class. My co-teacher plows through the textbook portion and I get through my activity with only a few hiccups which involved shushing the class and calling out ten kids. Five for hitting their neighbors; two for talking; another two for shouting out the wrong answer; and one for wiping his boogers on the top of his desk. With three minutes left my co-teacher plays a song about the lesson. This being the last lesson in the unit everyone knows the song off by heart and start yelling and screaming like hooligans at a soccer game. The two criers plug their ears and bury their heads in their desk. Half way through the boy who was late yelled over all of them in Korean which resulted in 25 voices attacking right back. There was no control, nothing could prevent a screaming match except for the bell and the promise of food. As the yelling continued to escalate, looking at the clock I just started waving and saying goodbye. They all stopped looking in wonder and hearing the end of the bell chiming. In an even bigger uproar everyone climbs overs chairs and desks to file out the backdoor of the classroom. Waving good bye to the last student it was remarkable to see what they left behind. A desk was knocked over, no chairs were pushed in, worksheets littered the floor and my co-teacher was already out the door.
I put on some Sammy R to clean and straighten the desks. Some students from another third grade class came into help as well. I promised them candy but I don't think they understood.
Thank goodness lunch was good. Then my afternoon class was just tattle-tales and nothing fun. I'm burnt out. Sleep is happening tonight.
Saturday, October 19, 2013
Speaking Tests: The DMV of the Teaching World.
At least once a year I have to perform speaking tests for each class. I set up a desk and two chairs across from each other in the hall with pictures of our topics. This time around its food. Students come out one by one to identify the pictures and answer some questions related to liking and not liking food, or reading a list of food. It's a pretty dull set of days. There are lots of things I hate about this week of bogus testing. First of all, these ESL classes are run like universities in the sense that you will have less than ten evaluations over the course of the year. Personally, I find this to be really stupid in an elementary school, because of the whole good day, bad day business, and you can't scope a student's ability based on only ten assessments, if that.
Speaking tests are one of these and the students are given an A,B, or C. An A obviously is perfect. B is a pretty big gap varying from major mistakes to minor ones. A C is an North American F. Obviously I don't agree with this at all because barely passing and just missing perfection is the same mark. I gets really finicky too. Some kids who are head and shoulders above their class will throw an advanced phrase they've learned at the academy which the state would fail because the program bases itself on cookie-cutter answers. I don't really follow these guidelines because there's more than one way to get your point across in a conversation. In the end I don't even know where this information gets processed, part of me doesn't want to know anyways.
The materials I get for these tests are crap too. Once again, I'm just given the resources, the marking sheet, then fed a script. No input required. However, I did get to change a picture on a test! One of the food's to identify is chicken; the picture is a platter of fried chicken that goes outside of the frame printed in black and white. I got a variety of answers when kids were asked to tell me what they see: flowers, ice cream, curry, candy, cookies, and "I don't know." Obviously this was a write-off answer. So long as they said an English word I let it go. The next day I told my CT and she printed off a nice roast chicken with a clip-art watermark plain as day in the middle of the picture.Having these is a major pet peeve so I went back to the mystery food because its far more entertaining.
That's when I realized this viably redundant assessment is turning me into a bitter asshole. There's no stimulation or excitement. Also the windows are open for air circulation; as a result, the hallway is a wind tunnel if the wind picks up. Don't worry I tape down my pictures, but the gusts just send an icy shiver up my spine and having cashed in all my paid sick days from being stuck in the hospital I can't afford to get sick this winter.
Upsides still exist: having the reigns of the hall and three pieces of furniture, learning kids names slowly, and chatting with my favorites. It's a dreary job but as a civil servant in Korea I'm bound to get stuck with hokey paperwork that I'm not 100% for. It's just like working at the DMV: move the lines, tick the boxes, complain, punch-out, and forget about it. I became a teacher to make a difference in the future of the world, and for these classes life is super mundane. I've finished off the Grade 3s at the tail-end of this past week, and I have 6 more Grade 4 classes to go. Workload stat: 162 more letters too write in the appropriate box. At least they're no multiple choice questions.
Speaking tests are one of these and the students are given an A,B, or C. An A obviously is perfect. B is a pretty big gap varying from major mistakes to minor ones. A C is an North American F. Obviously I don't agree with this at all because barely passing and just missing perfection is the same mark. I gets really finicky too. Some kids who are head and shoulders above their class will throw an advanced phrase they've learned at the academy which the state would fail because the program bases itself on cookie-cutter answers. I don't really follow these guidelines because there's more than one way to get your point across in a conversation. In the end I don't even know where this information gets processed, part of me doesn't want to know anyways.
The materials I get for these tests are crap too. Once again, I'm just given the resources, the marking sheet, then fed a script. No input required. However, I did get to change a picture on a test! One of the food's to identify is chicken; the picture is a platter of fried chicken that goes outside of the frame printed in black and white. I got a variety of answers when kids were asked to tell me what they see: flowers, ice cream, curry, candy, cookies, and "I don't know." Obviously this was a write-off answer. So long as they said an English word I let it go. The next day I told my CT and she printed off a nice roast chicken with a clip-art watermark plain as day in the middle of the picture.Having these is a major pet peeve so I went back to the mystery food because its far more entertaining.
That's when I realized this viably redundant assessment is turning me into a bitter asshole. There's no stimulation or excitement. Also the windows are open for air circulation; as a result, the hallway is a wind tunnel if the wind picks up. Don't worry I tape down my pictures, but the gusts just send an icy shiver up my spine and having cashed in all my paid sick days from being stuck in the hospital I can't afford to get sick this winter.
Upsides still exist: having the reigns of the hall and three pieces of furniture, learning kids names slowly, and chatting with my favorites. It's a dreary job but as a civil servant in Korea I'm bound to get stuck with hokey paperwork that I'm not 100% for. It's just like working at the DMV: move the lines, tick the boxes, complain, punch-out, and forget about it. I became a teacher to make a difference in the future of the world, and for these classes life is super mundane. I've finished off the Grade 3s at the tail-end of this past week, and I have 6 more Grade 4 classes to go. Workload stat: 162 more letters too write in the appropriate box. At least they're no multiple choice questions.
Wednesday, October 16, 2013
minimalist
after walking through this school after lunch countless times i'm used to the routine. the children pack up their things and head to their after school program, some are even in the school. in these classrooms monitors and materials that are stowed in the back of the class set aside for these programs. meanwhile i'm in a library where ottomans are desks, the curriculum is on scraps of paper that change day to day, and there isn't a textbook in sight.
i remember when i was given the reigns to teach an afternoon class all by myself. i was ecstatic. on my schedule i was so optimistic that in november i planned an independent novel study. reality has sunk in. even the word novel is something lost in this learning environment but i have accepted these discouraging facts. i'm an esl teacher not a language arts teacher at some prestigious middle school in southern ontario. teachers and admin have not granted me any sort of advice or goal for my afternoon classes, thus, i'm doing what ever i feel like which is coaching these kids to not only read but understand what they're reading.
do i need a smart board? do i need a textbook? do i need a fucking curriculum to teach children? no, but sometimes i wish i could reward them with youtube videos on a big screen. i'll admit worksheets have been overused as have shared and group readings but when there's nothing cool and educational inspiration doesn't kick me in the teeth. in the beginning i only had a plethora of books-- 80% about drivel they couldn't understand-- and a whiteboard the size of a monopoly junior board which was the glue to having instructions and examples for my little learners. only recently did i find a half-busted whiteboard in the garbage heap of a resource room. now life is significantly better because i'm not crammed for writing space.
for the record i'm not venting about my lack of resources i'm just enlightening you, the reader, that education doesn't ride on flash and jazz. it helps in some cases but its founded on the questions you ask and the discussions you have about the answers. these kids are learning about plot and inferences, countless times in the beginning kids would pull words off the page and use it as their answer. that didn't fly with me, paraphrasing isn't a word my co-teachers know so i've had to get my students to paraphrase by talking about pictures and the bare bones of our scholastic and hello reader products. most of them are fighting with this and now some are starting to win and its nice to see. after my first class of grades 3-4 storytelling, as we call it, seeing the product is like watching the sun rising in the west.
and i've done that with creativity and hard work on both sides of the worksheet. after being in teacher's college with a smart board in every room, then the same deal in my first placement i realized that teaching can be low maintenance and easy to get kids involved. my second placement was in a low-end toronto school with little extra-curricular activities and zero spending money. i was stuck using overheads, worksheets, and writing notes on a 'black'board. reality sank in that equal education doesn't exist in ontario. mind you the professionals i met on my second placement could teach circles around those smart board technicians. still, there isn't an educational equality. i'm still not the best but getting these opportunities to be a minimalist teacher is so helpful because the world isn't perfect: power surges, computer malfunctions, misplaced flash drives happen to the best of us. its always nice to have mediums other than pen to paper and a voice (lemon juice helps with that issue) but warming up to this job with minimal resources benefits, and preserves, what makes someone a good teacher. i mean c'mon, who needs a shift key especially if you're doing an editing workshop?
i remember when i was given the reigns to teach an afternoon class all by myself. i was ecstatic. on my schedule i was so optimistic that in november i planned an independent novel study. reality has sunk in. even the word novel is something lost in this learning environment but i have accepted these discouraging facts. i'm an esl teacher not a language arts teacher at some prestigious middle school in southern ontario. teachers and admin have not granted me any sort of advice or goal for my afternoon classes, thus, i'm doing what ever i feel like which is coaching these kids to not only read but understand what they're reading.
do i need a smart board? do i need a textbook? do i need a fucking curriculum to teach children? no, but sometimes i wish i could reward them with youtube videos on a big screen. i'll admit worksheets have been overused as have shared and group readings but when there's nothing cool and educational inspiration doesn't kick me in the teeth. in the beginning i only had a plethora of books-- 80% about drivel they couldn't understand-- and a whiteboard the size of a monopoly junior board which was the glue to having instructions and examples for my little learners. only recently did i find a half-busted whiteboard in the garbage heap of a resource room. now life is significantly better because i'm not crammed for writing space.
for the record i'm not venting about my lack of resources i'm just enlightening you, the reader, that education doesn't ride on flash and jazz. it helps in some cases but its founded on the questions you ask and the discussions you have about the answers. these kids are learning about plot and inferences, countless times in the beginning kids would pull words off the page and use it as their answer. that didn't fly with me, paraphrasing isn't a word my co-teachers know so i've had to get my students to paraphrase by talking about pictures and the bare bones of our scholastic and hello reader products. most of them are fighting with this and now some are starting to win and its nice to see. after my first class of grades 3-4 storytelling, as we call it, seeing the product is like watching the sun rising in the west.
and i've done that with creativity and hard work on both sides of the worksheet. after being in teacher's college with a smart board in every room, then the same deal in my first placement i realized that teaching can be low maintenance and easy to get kids involved. my second placement was in a low-end toronto school with little extra-curricular activities and zero spending money. i was stuck using overheads, worksheets, and writing notes on a 'black'board. reality sank in that equal education doesn't exist in ontario. mind you the professionals i met on my second placement could teach circles around those smart board technicians. still, there isn't an educational equality. i'm still not the best but getting these opportunities to be a minimalist teacher is so helpful because the world isn't perfect: power surges, computer malfunctions, misplaced flash drives happen to the best of us. its always nice to have mediums other than pen to paper and a voice (lemon juice helps with that issue) but warming up to this job with minimal resources benefits, and preserves, what makes someone a good teacher. i mean c'mon, who needs a shift key especially if you're doing an editing workshop?
Tuesday, October 15, 2013
Canadian Thanksgiving
After a little rough patch in September the rest of October is shaping up to be pretty memorable. I can't raise my arms in celebration but that doesn't mean I'll never celebrate. Since being out of the hospital I've had to change my routine to accommodate my disability by waking up earlier, eating more take-out, pan-frying less, and putting my belt through pant loops before putting my pants on. I've also had to buy several things to make life easier: back scrubber, back scratcher, slip-on Vans, and a messenger bag. I feel so much older bringing a messenger bag to school instead of a back-pack. I'm no longer that man-child-teachah with 5 o'clock shadow! Since button-up shirts are easier to take on and off I rarely wear t-shirts anymore too. Obviously drinking in excess doesn't happen because of that whole trust issue I have with my wobbly, drunken self. Despite finding out tripping down to Cambodia and CM, again, is no longer an option I'm still jazzed about the entries/events to come:
- Halloween Hat
- Comfort Korean Food
- Community Gardens
- Cultural Day/ Dinner
In honor of Canadian Thanksgiving here are the Top 5 things I'm thankful for:
5. Still having my awesome job. Kids keep you young.
4. Slip-on Vans.
3. The delicious Canadian Thanksgiving dinner provided by HQ Bar and the company that came with it.
2. The friends and family near and far who always find a way to brighten my day.
1. Not being in the hospital.
- Halloween Hat
- Comfort Korean Food
- Community Gardens
- Cultural Day/ Dinner
In honor of Canadian Thanksgiving here are the Top 5 things I'm thankful for:
5. Still having my awesome job. Kids keep you young.
4. Slip-on Vans.
3. The delicious Canadian Thanksgiving dinner provided by HQ Bar and the company that came with it.
2. The friends and family near and far who always find a way to brighten my day.
1. Not being in the hospital.
Monday, October 7, 2013
Korean Kid: Each Kid has at Least One Surprise in Them.
The first day my co-teacher for the day told me to ride the tide and take it easy. I still had the privilege of splitting a lesson with her. Our lesson involves food so most kids are interested in it. As teachers, we're barely speaking Korean too. Because of the simplicity I picked on the lower-level kids to answer some questions.
There's this one boy who I've known for a year now and has always struggled with English and it seems to carry over from the way other students act towards him. Consequently, he's completely checked out in class be it reading comics or doodling he has zero interest in learning. Today I call on him to identify a cookie. As usual he looks at me, then my co-teacher, then the screen, shrugs his shoulders, and goes back to doodling. BUT this time this little girl who sits next to him whispers something to him. He nods and reaches into his desk pulling out a GLASSES CASE. He takes out his glasses and puts them on and once again stares at the screen. Meanwhile, I could have shit a brick. Thankfully cookie is the same thing in Korean so he got the answer right. He's on the road to redemption.
Never a dull moment in an elementary school.
I'm Glad to be back.
There's this one boy who I've known for a year now and has always struggled with English and it seems to carry over from the way other students act towards him. Consequently, he's completely checked out in class be it reading comics or doodling he has zero interest in learning. Today I call on him to identify a cookie. As usual he looks at me, then my co-teacher, then the screen, shrugs his shoulders, and goes back to doodling. BUT this time this little girl who sits next to him whispers something to him. He nods and reaches into his desk pulling out a GLASSES CASE. He takes out his glasses and puts them on and once again stares at the screen. Meanwhile, I could have shit a brick. Thankfully cookie is the same thing in Korean so he got the answer right. He's on the road to redemption.
Never a dull moment in an elementary school.
I'm Glad to be back.
Thursday, October 3, 2013
I had an Idea, then it Spun outta Control. Here it ... is.
I have a checkout date and that feels weird. Now that I know the things I need to do when I open the door to my apartment: throw out food, clean (maybe), dust (efff that), there are probably dishes, sort mail, laundry, take out the trash, then buy and make food. Okay, part of me is really excited about food but for the past two weeks and change I have had get to the bathroom on my own, and clean chopsticks and a spoon. The vacation is over, and I'm antsy about the bill as well as the trip back into being an adult. Then come Monday there's this thing I have called a job. Hell, I can't even remember what my office looks like. In the end it'll be nice to get back to work and see all the teachers and kids. With all of these things comes one thing I haven't missed at all, eye-gouging stress.
There's been a bulwark in the hospital from certain aspects of Korea that I loathe. I haven't dealt with scooter-riding turds weaving from the road to the sidewalk and back. My supremely anal teacher has not asked me to do anything in over a month which feels more like a year. The routine is so simple here that both the nurses and I manage to get by with the marginal English and Korean crossover we share (although I'm sure both of us use a translation generator before speaking to one another). Also, no one would push past an injured person on the subway or an escalator. Hospitals showcase hospitality and outside there isn't a lot of hospitality in the hustle-bustle of a Korean workday... which is everyday. Either way, when you're insincerely pushed off-stride, told to do something last minute, calming a screaming child that doesn't understand you, or just trying to solve an issue can't hop over the language barrier life gets frustrating little by little until the weekend rolls around. This is when the watering holes fill up and people rant, dance, and guzzle until all the weight of the week slides off your shoulders and you're back to the care-free days of an undergrad .
Since I've been off the front lines for a long time and coming back in the middle of the semester I don't have time to smell the roses. The second I walk in those doors I'm one lesson behind and have an hour to solve the problem. I'm already anticipating a cold Cafri just thinking about Monday. In the end, when the going gets to be too much the bottle's my alleviate. That's what scares me. My parents have warned me about my alcoholic family members and the belief its genetic, and that was a good scare tactic until I read A Million Little Pieces. Despite all the controversy around it, a story is a story; anyone can salvage a lesson out of fiction. What I got out of Frey's novel was that you are in charge of your own life, genetic weaknesses or not just a mentality with stuff like that. I'm slowly learning this isn't the case all the time (E.g. my current situation). But when you fall off a horse, or a wagon, you get back on again or you can mope and complain about it. Plain and simple, your actions reflect your choices not some higher power or voodoo magic.
When I step out of this hospital its a different ball game. Not because my arm is out of commission but I feel wiser than I was before and have a lot of empathy for the injured. Being isolated in a hospital as an anomaly is an experience I never want to experience again. How I play ultimate will change. When Boody Miles ruined his knee in Friday Night Lights he came back and wasn't confident playing his best on it and then became a regular Joe in two plays. Same here, Boody, if I fall on my left side, I wouldn't feel confident putting my arm out to brace myself let alone lean on it. The road to recovery will be a long one. The road to regaining confidence will be even longer. I started this blog to talk about how life makes me drink for all sorts of reasons but now that doesn't seem as important. Mind you drinking with this will be a bad idea because drunk "logic" can go like this. I won't turn myself into an alcoholic escapist because I will make life fun, stress-free, and without vices. If another curveball comes my way I'll just take a step out of the batter's box, have couple deep breathes, then go back in and try to hit it out of the park.
... Since I made a few baseball references...
Dodgers beat the Red Sox in 5*
When I step out of this hospital its a different ball game. Not because my arm is out of commission but I feel wiser than I was before and have a lot of empathy for the injured. Being isolated in a hospital as an anomaly is an experience I never want to experience again. How I play ultimate will change. When Boody Miles ruined his knee in Friday Night Lights he came back and wasn't confident playing his best on it and then became a regular Joe in two plays. Same here, Boody, if I fall on my left side, I wouldn't feel confident putting my arm out to brace myself let alone lean on it. The road to recovery will be a long one. The road to regaining confidence will be even longer. I started this blog to talk about how life makes me drink for all sorts of reasons but now that doesn't seem as important. Mind you drinking with this will be a bad idea because drunk "logic" can go like this. I won't turn myself into an alcoholic escapist because I will make life fun, stress-free, and without vices. If another curveball comes my way I'll just take a step out of the batter's box, have couple deep breathes, then go back in and try to hit it out of the park.
... Since I made a few baseball references...
Dodgers beat the Red Sox in 5*
* I don't watch baseball.
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